The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Today's reading talks about life - real life - unpredictable, challenging, adverse. Living life on life's terms is a great slogan that our tools help us change from an idea to a lifestyle!
For many, before recovery, when bothered, we would remain quiet to avoid upsetting someone else. We found often that the best of intentions in these scenarios went way different than planned/hoped - disastrous at times. We would become irritable and unreasonable as we let resentments fester.
With recovery, we learn that adversity has value that we previously were unaware of. When we face adversity and deal with issues and/or express our feelings, things have a chance to improve. Even if they don't, we can release some of the pressure learning how to do so with grace. We feel better when we realize that we have begun to live life on life's terms.
Today's reminder -- The Chinese word for crisis is written with two brush strokes. The first stands for danger, and the second for opportunity. I will look for the good hidden within everything I encounter.
Today's quote from Richard Back -- "There is no such thing as a problem without a gift for you in its hands."
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I arrived believing and thinking that my life was way worse than others, and I could not imagine what I had ever done to deserve 'it'. As I embraced recovery, I realized much of my thoughts were distorted and my outlook was slanted towards the negative. While I could not change anything else around me, I could consider changing me, my thoughts, attitudes, actions, reactions, etc.
As the fog lifted, I began to 'see' I was not alone. Each person I encounter in each moment of my day has some type of challenge and life can be messy and beautiful at the same time. Not dealing with things doesn't work for me, as resentments send me backwards. Using a great sponsor and program tools with my HP, I am better equipped today to deal with what is each day, one day at a time.
I am not expected to know everything nor solve everything. I am expected to do my best, and be of service to others, one day at a time. Living life on life's terms helps me see that 'life' happens and how I roll with it matters for my serenity, joy and recovery.
TGIF all - make it a great day! I have no plans today - it's catch up time around the house. Off for a long walk with my sweet dog and my HP. (((Hugs)))
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Good Morning IAH embracing the principles of recovery certainly has helped to change my long held negative attitudes. I am ever so grateful. Have a great Friday
I love your line "as the fog lifted" - that describes really well how I have felt so often on this journey. Seems the fog is lifting slowly but surely, and getting less and less foggy each time another layer lifts. I credit living life on life's terms, and not trying to force life to be something it is not for this major improvement.
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Skorpi
If you are depressed, you are living in the past. If you are anxious, you are living in the future. If you are at peace, you are living in the present. - Lao Tzu
Thank you, IAH for the daily. I appreciate everyone's shares on this topic.
I grew up never thinking adversity was an opportunity to grow as a person. As a huge people-pleaser & planner, I thought adversity in my life meant I HAD NOT DONE ENOUGH to make the scenario go the "right" way. Looking back, I can laugh and say, "What an ego I had!!!How could little ol' me wield enough power to affect all this?" But the way I had become was making me so negative... b/c of course, things didn't always go the way I planned so hard for them to go!! LOL!
Living life on life's terms is a great slogan... it is hard to always accept though. Sometimes life is hard. This year is both a year of freedom and of hardship for me. Two sides of the coin, so to speak. I make progress, then life throws me a curveball... over and over. In the past, I would've wallowed in my despair and self-pity. And don't get me wrong, I did do so for many weeks after leaving my home & marriage. But the key was that I was a part of this community. That I eventually embraced F2F meetings, and I did not quit when I began to feel good. Because it is very easy for our minds to forget the negative... to coast along with the good times. This program has helped me to ride out the curve balls that come my way.
Enjoy your walk and hug that pooch for me, IAH!
I am in the last week of my Pharmacy Tech program, and I am using today as a study day, as I have a big final tomorrow and next week will be my State Board test! Hopefully, LIFE will stop with the curve balls and hang a few high so that I can knock it out of the park!
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"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
Yay PnP - last week of the program and finals/boards soon. Way to go girl - so, so proud of you!
Thanks all for the shares. Life on Life's Terms has been a great slogan for me, just for today. As many of you know, my oldest graduated college last weekend. It's been an interesting journey to the completion, and he's sober today about 8 months. His brother celebrated 1 year in April, and called today sharing that he relapsed. He made his year and then it happened. It is about a girl - broken relationship - so he thinks. He does know that he stopped doing what was working - meetings, sponsor, steps, etc. as he got wrapped up and distracted by the girlfriend.
While I am sad for him, I am incredibly grateful. This is not his first relapse and his brother celebrated 5 years and then went back out - not a relapse, a planned 'test' that lasted a while and cost him a bunch. Yet - for me, the mother, I am grateful because they are both still alive. They are both still leaning into recovery despite set-backs, slips, relapses, etc. They are imperfect yet learning each day and therefore they are maturing.
Trust me when I say their journeys have been heart-breaking to watch at times and are about as far as what I wanted for them as humanly possible. Yet, as I keep leaning into recovery, HP, and a spiritual existence, I am constantly reminded how powerless I really am. Also, this is the first time my youngest has ever told me he relapsed - usually he disappears, ends up in jail or homeless and is forced to share. This time, it happened, he reached out for help from program folks and let me know in his time. He has 17 days again this time, and I am as proud of 17 days as I was 365 days.
I would literally give my life and or any body part away for my boys to have an easier journey. Yet, I fundamentally know in my heart and accept that God has a different plan. Just for today, I can be of service and support to them and pray for guidance one day at a time.
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
IAH.........I relate to the giving up body parts and all that goes with it. Life is never easy but still.........seeing the kids struggle so much is the hardest part! Hugs and prayers
