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Post Info TOPIC: Staying on my side of the street


~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 1092
Date:
Staying on my side of the street


I could use a refresher course on this today.  My bf came down with shingles on my bday 2 days ago.  Poor man is suffering horribly but he keeps trying to do too much, he winds up in pain, and he has been barking orders and being crabby at all of us today.  I know how hard it is to be positive when you are in pain but I do have to keep reminding me to stay on my side of the street and to just get out of his way.  With his autoimmune disorder and now the shingles, I have to fight to keep quiet when I see him do too much along with him showing signs of being in pain and regretting doing too much.

It's so hard to shut up and stay in my own hula hoop, lol.  



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Never grow a wishbone where your backbone ought to be!


~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 13683
Date:

 

 

You  just reminded me to get past come procrastination....Mahalo...will be back soon.  (((hugs))) aww



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~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 13683
Date:

 

 

Okay Mahalo Andromeda...confirmed shingles is contagious and so I have got to be alert.  One of our meeting members admitted she has it after she gave me a hug last Sunday.  Just gonna be more alert and informed as I read up on it.  At my age I have experienced similar symptoms often but not the disease.  Gotta watch out who I hug now eh?   ((((hugs)))) smile



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~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 15998
Date:

((I hear you my dear))) just pray for guidance and remember to say what you mean without saying it mean

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Betty

THE HIGHEST FORM OF WISDOM IS KINDNESS

Talmud


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Online
Posts: 8454
Date:

(((Andromeda))) - great share and post....I've had shingles a couple times, mild once and more moderate the next time. I'm grateful I did not have a bad, bad case - I was in pain, very uncomfortable and for me, stress is a huge trigger. Jerry - I don't have to 'catch them' - they've just appeared and yes....people stepped away from me when they found out I had them.

I can totally relate to how your guy is Andromeda....I don't do 'well' with resting and relaxing - I get satisfaction and esteem from action, and resting even when sick is very, very difficult for me. I'm sorry you and the kids are on the receiving end of his illness...gave me insight into my 'people' and how I probably am when I am defiant of my body...

My best thought is this too shall pass! Hang in there!

__________________

Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging.  Pause before assuming.  Pause before accusing.  Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret.  ~~~~  Lori Deschene

 

 



~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 15998
Date:

Andromedia I did receive the Shingles vaccine a few years ago and I so recommend this

__________________
Betty

THE HIGHEST FORM OF WISDOM IS KINDNESS

Talmud
Bo


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 581
Date:

The analogy of "staying on my side of the street" sounds so easy, LOL. How hard could it be? LOL. It's the concept, the real meaning behind the simple analogy that is brutally hard. It's like detachment -- sounds simple. But there is physical detachment and emotional detachment. The former was easy for me, the latter initially seemed impossible. I had to change my thinking, I had to change the way I was thinking. I had to make changes I wasn't sure I could make.

So, staying on my side of the street -- as it relates to another -- also very hard. So much gets in the way. Set aside our "disease" and what happens to us. Just look at this type of simple -- the other person -- and caring, loving, etc., the other person. When another "does too much" we feel helpless. I have never found anything wrong, with proper, integrity, authentic motives -- in this situation -- offering something. A hand? An opinion? A concern? Something. Not doing anything is fine to. To each their own. But, as a loved one is doing what they are doing -- sickness, disease, etc. aside -- I have offered help, offered support, and have said "I love you so much, and don't want to see you suffer, in pain, etc. -- is there anything I can do, I don't want to see you overdo it because I know you love me/us and always do for us" and so on.

For me, the most important part...I am not vested in the outcome.

__________________

Bo

Keep coming back...

God, grant me the serenity...to accept the PEOPLE I cannot change...the courage to change the ONE I can...and the wisdom to know it's ME...

 

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