Al-Anon Family Group

The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.

Members Login
Username 
 
Password 
    Remember Me  
Post Info TOPIC: ODAT reading 3-20-2018


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 17196
Date:
ODAT reading 3-20-2018


The ODAT reading for March 20  speaks about the Al-Anon program being a spiritual idea. It points out that because we are willing to acknowledge that something or someone is  "Greater "than we are and are willing to surrender to this power  with humility this becomes a Spiritual idea. The reading suggests that in order to practice spirituality,we must learn to surrender and become humble  because once we do this and turn to a spiritual idea for guidance life begins to change. The reading points out  that it is our confidence in a higher power, working in us, that releases and activates our ability to make life  more joyful. as we  alone cannot bring success  by  relying only on ourselves  and our  limited. ideas .
The quote is from Romans; "let every soul be subject unto the higher power,for there is no power of God."
 
I know when I first entered program I was angry with the God of my understanding, because he did not work according to my will. Attending Al-Anon meetings and reading literature, embracing the principles, I finally decided that I could use the Al-Anon program as my higher power and successfully practice program.  This was because  I could see how the tools worked and I was willing to surrender to the concepts.
 
After many years of using the program as my HP, finally reaching the acceptance of life on life's and  becoming a little more humble , I understood that it was not my will, that ran the universe,so  I was able to envision a higher power that was perfect, wisdom love, courage, knowledge, compassion.  With that definition of a higher power. I am able to turn my will and life over every day.

I must note that I have been given many difficult challenges as I practiced this program and would like to assure you that as the 11th step states. I was never asked to do something that I did not receive the power to do. I may not have  liked  the condition  I found myself in and it may have caused me much sadness however I was given the courage and wisdom to walk through it .
Have a great day
 
 

 

ea


__________________
Betty

THE HIGHEST FORM OF WISDOM IS KINDNESS

Talmud


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 2725
Date:

Betty thanks for the daily and your ESH. I am having a positive experience with the God of my understanding too. I also think that since I became a spiritual person, I feel more complete and not alone. My brothers think people that believe in God are part of mass hysteria or a delusion. They will never understand my belief system but it works better than ever, since I joined Alanon. I am grateful for the tools and guidance I receive from Alanon, Lyne

__________________

Lyne



~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 11569
Date:

Thank you Betty for the daily and your service. Thanks to both for your shares and ESH. I too came to recovery angry at the God of my youth and felt abandoned and alone. When I was told I could define my HP in my own way, it gave me just enough to begin a spiritual journey. I now feel that all of my previous experience was not in vain - it was just a foundation to tweak as needed and grow from.

I do best when I surrender my will each morning as best I can. I do trust and feel a HP in my life and it's become far more natural through practice. I'm very grateful that recovery allowed me to develop a one on one relationship with a power greater than I - not certain where I'd be without it.

Happy Tuesday to all - make it a lovely day!

__________________

Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging.  Pause before assuming.  Pause before accusing.  Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret.  ~~~~  Lori Deschene

 

 



~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 2940
Date:

 Thanks Betty, and hi, Lyne...

Part of my journey was to embrace established religion, and then find it wanting. The reason being that I found peace and comfort in the rooms that did not seem to exist out there in the religious world.

I became impatient that the churches could not always relate to people in extreme circumstances. As a kid the pub was a mile down the road and the church half a mile. My mum and dad "went to Sunday School" in the back bar of the pub. I suppose they went there to have a few drinks- and to try and remember what they said and did the night before. No-one sent me to church or anything- I just went along. I liked the singing and I joined the Sunday School.

I never had any trouble with God. I never asked God why he couldn't fix this, that or the next thing. I kind of accepted that sometimes things happen. At age 20 my life had fallen apart. My hopes and dreams were in shatters. But then I had a spiritual experience. This was a turning point for me. Did it make my life easy? No- the opposite. it was a really tough grind. But along the way I married and had a family. I had contact with my family of origin too. I became a member of Alanon at age 32. As I began to change- the difference with my family opened wounds, as it appeared.

This was a part of my journey- to coin an old cliche... and it still is... I do believe that my higher power will shine the light of wisdom on this issue. I do believe, long term, that my family had adapted too- though along the way they were reluctant to admit it.

In Alanon we get along to a religion of our choice. or to no religion at at all. I am okay with this. Some churches expect 100% loyalty. For me i always fall back on Alanon Concept 4. "Participation is the key to harmony".

I learned this in Alanon- but it applies to other organisations as well. It has rubbed off onto other things i do. This concept also applies to family. For me- this was not only about creating harmony around me. It was also about internal peace and hope. It grew on me.

With this in mind I can go back to a religious organisation and make a space for people like me. I can be in that space along with people like me. I can speak, over time, wit the wider body of people out there- including the religious. I do not have to do this on my own. I know that every Alanon member is rubbing shoulders with the world around them- and having some sort of impact.

For me that impact was designed to create light rather than heat. And the heat was designed to create warmth.

This was a part of the growing process- when I started the words I might have used was friction and abrasion- because this was all that I knew.

These days I can get into a meeting and take my time... I can listen, and absorb.

As a kid I found places where I felt safe. I learned that i was a part of this process. I did not stand alone outside of it. A part rather than apart. biggrin...

Thanks for the time to share; 

for your service Betty, and for your attendance, y'all...

it really does make a difference! smile ...



__________________

Each Alanon member is my teacher.                                                                                                                  



~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 13696
Date:

 

Aloha and Mahalo ...Thank You for this service Betty.  This post ...all of it...is a keeper for me.  I will come back to it several times again today. Often times I come upon a post subject and wonder ahead of time if it will apply and be supportive for me.  It's the "wanting guarantees" issue however you ended your post with two initials in lower case which when spoken in my cultural language have meaning and in this case deep meaning.

See the "ea"?  It forms a question in my language...pronounced "ay ah" and I find my Higher Power asking me after I read your post, "Isn't that true...isn't it so"?   MY response to my Higher Power is 'oia 'i 'o True.  

As an 11 year old terribly broken up by the disease in my family I ran away from home into the mountain spaces just outside of my village and when there I sat upon a very large boulder and rocked back and forth crying, "please help me" over and over and over.  I experience this event this morning with your post and know the prayer is still being responded to by Akua...my HP who has gratefully used you and your post to assure me.

(((((hugs))))) smile



__________________


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 17196
Date:

Thank you Jerry, David, IAM and Lyne for your inspiring messages, I have had many spiritual experiences in my lifetime and the most memorable is the one that i whispered silently in the depths of my being that HP heard and responded to. I am so grateful for his family Thank you all for being here .
Jerry I do not know how" ea " was included d in my post-- it is a HP thing



-- Edited by Iamhere on Sunday 31st of January 2021 12:06:38 PM

__________________
Betty

THE HIGHEST FORM OF WISDOM IS KINDNESS

Talmud


Senior Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 221
Date:

Thank you Betty for ODAT and for your service and thank you for ESH from all. I have read this several times today thinking about my HP. I started off early going to church, singing in the choir and taking my younger siblings to Sunday school as well as teaching it. I felt I was in good graces of the God of my understanding. I did feel a bit alone in my thoughts as my parents only attended with me on Easter and sometimes Christmas. Their spiritual understanding and mine were not the same. As I grew older my religious faith faltered when pain and confusion and alcoholism reared it's ugly head. Why would a loving God allow this to happen and why? I was broken and angry with God when I found Al-Anon. Inside the doors I slowly learned the 3 C's and heard people who were able to smile or laugh although their challenges were far greater than mine. I found that I had a choice of what I considered greater than me. I chose the program and the Sun. Everyday I say Good Morning to the Sun and thank it for another day because even when I can't see it I know it is there. I also am grateful for my Al-anon family because they too are always there and their wisdom shines through their words of ESH.

__________________

HES



~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 17196
Date:

((Stan)) Thank you so very much for sharing your powerful wisdom on this topic, I can so identify.



-- Edited by hotrod on Tuesday 20th of March 2018 04:43:04 PM

__________________
Betty

THE HIGHEST FORM OF WISDOM IS KINDNESS

Talmud


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 13696
Date:

 

 

I love that message Stan...Thank you and your Higher Power for the courage to share it.   Hugs  smile



__________________


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 13696
Date:

 

 

Betty I am reminded of a period of time in early recovery where I questioned of the fellowship, "Who are these people and how are they called" (by what name)  and after a bit of time in meditation I arrived at "they must be called "walkers" because they truly walk the program".  The post and the responses remind me again of the response to my question.       ea       ((((hugs)))) smile

 

Betty I remember the time in this journey when the idea of Spiritual needed to be questioned and redefined so that it didn't find me trapped within the context of religion which had a tremendous negative affect in my life.  I was born into one old very strict belief with strong conservative history and constant threats of punishment if we didn't adhere to our beliefs 24/7.  The rules often were flexible dependent upon who was pastoring the church in membership and so for much of my life my "spirit" was depressed, anxious and wanting validation.  I served in the church on several levels including education and music and such with a aim to prove myself.  UGH!!  I studied theology made up my mind who I would marry even as to what religion I would accept in a spouse.  I had a plan and the plan caught fire and blew up two years into the marriage when I married a woman who became addicted to a belief that taught my wife that I was in "the church of the devil".  This was an religious addict who came with a whole hoard of other addicts.  Trying to make it work was doomed and the insanity and pain affected everyone including children and in-laws.  I lost everything and even the government and courts came against me.  I opted to try to make it come out my ways and things got worse....of course.  I married again after a relationship with an alcoholic and to another alcoholic addict.  This woman my HP used to get me here, keep me here and offer me a possible solution to the insanity I was choosing to live in without wanting to.  

Life with my Alcoholic/Addict was insanity with the religious affiliation being to mind and mood altering chemicals.  It was a variation of insanity because we never mentioned God or a Higher Power or such and the program wasn't involved; not the sober program anyways.  In many ways I felt shame that I had not before because I was "in love" with the addict/alcoholic.  She wasn't hurting me thru religious belief and then the marriage didn't work out and ended.

I lost trust and my spirit for having a sane life also died.  Everything nice and happy and sane died and I spent the time making two trips into recovery both Al-Anon and AA.  I didn't like either and when I could stay away I did from both until my Higher Power closed the gap on my life.  Of course many many sick and negative things came to happen for me and those things don't count now; they do not have the power they once had at all.

My Higher Power started to direct me; placing recovering elders in my journey who offered their recovery successes and then my sponsors who for me are saints.  I listened and learned and worked it and duplicated what they were doing which worked for them which also started to work for me.   

My Al-Anon Family Home group gave me a definition of the program which worked deeply for me.  They said  "We are not a religion but if you work the steps religiously..."  so I got a different meaning of religious which of course is still working for me.  And then the meaning of Spirit coming to me as "the intention" of how I wish to live.   Sane and Sober is my intention...by spirit daily.   I measure how my life is to go daily with my HP confiding to me.  When I read your morning post and turned it over the response I got was   ea  ...simple.   (((hugs))) smile



-- Edited by Jerry F on Tuesday 20th of March 2018 08:53:12 PM

__________________


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 675
Date:

Thank you for your service, Betty, and for all the ESH... This thread is wonderful. I really like the idea of the Spirit of Alanon, that's what I hear, anyway. Because I am kind of bouncing around with my understanding of my HP, and it is sometimes the program, and sometimes something more and other, and this idea kind of unites the two for me. Will see how it goes from here ;)

__________________


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 17196
Date:

((Jerry)) I can so identify with the negative feelings around organized religion and am so pleased that you worked the program "religiously" and had a spiritual experience. You and your wisdom are a great asset to MIP.

__________________
Betty

THE HIGHEST FORM OF WISDOM IS KINDNESS

Talmud
Page 1 of 1  sorted by
 
Quick Reply

Please log in to post quick replies.