The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I am off my normal routine today, and so I'm using yesterday's posting from today's hope online for today's topic. That seemed like a great fit because the share is about accepting change.
The author shares that there have been times they are terrified of change, and that fear prevented them from accepting the inevitable change. When the author found themselves resisting change, they asked: What am I afraid of? Naming the fear helped, because the author realized that they are not living life to the fullest if they are living in fear.
The quote is from Georgia O'Keeffe: "I've been absolutely terrified every moment of my life - and I've never let it keep me from doing a single thing I wanted to do."
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Fear is a major challenge for me. I have always been fearful, convinced that if I do anything to make myself more than invisible, the repercussions will be terrible! I can look back to my childhood and I remember the fear of being bullied because someone noticed me. There was a point in my early 20's when I realized that I had lost so much, and fear had prevented me from fully enjoying what I had while I had it, that I refused to be afraid anymore. I was out and proud for sure then! lol Living with an active alcoholic brought the fear back. I regressed to the state of fear of being noticed, fear of making waves, fear of upsetting the fragile peace. It was only with my work in the AlAnon program and the support I found here that helped me to build the courage to push past my fear and live life again. I am thankful every day to the program, to MIP, and to all the members who have walked this path with me, one day at a time.
I hope you all make it a great day!
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Skorpi
If you are depressed, you are living in the past. If you are anxious, you are living in the future. If you are at peace, you are living in the present. - Lao Tzu
Good Morning Skorpi Thanks for sharing your thoughts on this important topic of change. Before entering program I found accepting any "Change " extremely difficult, It appears that became stuck in routine and accepting any change to that was a huge challenge.
Enter program, living one day at a time, trusting HP and working the Steps I soon discovered that I could easily embrace change and understand that it was necessary part of life. I am experiencing change to a bus schedule that I used to visit my sister in NJ- I am finding this a great annoyance as I need to find an alternate route. Program helps in this situation as well,
Good morning Betty and Skorpi - great ESH and shares - thank you! Thank you also skorpi for your service and the daily. Fear for me can be 'sneaky' in that I think I am trusting my HP and doing OK, and then it kind of sneaks up on me and my brain tries to turn left when HP wants me to turn right.
I love that recovery is never-ending. I love that each time or anytime I feel uncertain, uncomfortable or restless, there is a tool/answer in our program. I must find the courage to reach for one and use it, but each time I do, I am able to move forward with some level of comfort and confidence.
Fear has a couple meaning that pop into my head - the one that resonates more often today is the False Evidence Appearing Real. If I truly pause long enough for my head, heart and HP to align, I can see the path I should follow.
Make it a great day all - meeting day, grocery day and who knows what else...the sun is shining - a welcome break as we've had some cloudy for a few days! (((Hugs))) to all!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Fear was the major reason that I stayed with my AH for so long... even after a previous stint at rehab and noticing behaviors that I knew weren't aligned with a strong program!! It was an "emergency" type of situation that made me push past the fear. But yesterday I made amends to my son for keeping him in this situation b/c of MY fear. I owned up to my part in all this mess. He doesn't see it in this way, and for that I am grateful today... b/c I carry this guilt every day. I have lots of change in my life right now... but many times, change is good... so I am trying to focus on that, just for today, folks!
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"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
Living with an active alcoholic brought the fear back. I regressed to the state of fear of being noticed, fear of making waves, fear of upsetting the fragile peace. It was only with my work in the AlAnon program and the support I found here that helped me to build the courage to push past my fear and live life again. I am thankful every day to the program, to MIP, and to all the members who have walked this path with me, one day at a time. 