The material presented
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Hi I am New as well. Going through a tough time. Recently started divorce process and yesterday my A decided to attempt suicide and is hospital right now for psych evaluation. We have two little ones and it's taking a huge toll on everyone. Feel so lost right now.
Welcome Alo504LSU You are not alone. Alcoholism is a chronic disease over which we are powerless. I am sorry to read that hubby has attempted to take his own life and know how painful that can be.
Alanon is a recovery program for family members that holds face to face meetings in most communities and the hot line number can be found in the white page. There is help and hope so please do keep coming back here as well.
Alo504LSU,
Welcome to the group. I am sorry you are going through this right now. It is hard to take care of yourself and little ones and worry about someone who is suffering from depression. Thank goodness they are hospitalized. My ex-bf's depression would get worse when he drank heavily. Sometimes the only thing I could do was send the ambulance to his home. It was better to let professionals handle the situation. It can be such a heavy burden. I hope things get better. Alanon has 12 steps that we work on. The first step is that, " We admitted we were powerless over alcohol and that our lives had become unmanageable. We cannot change the alcoholic but we can change how we react to them, and that can enable us to live healthier lives.
Thank you, I am ready to start working on myself. I know I have a long road of head of me because this disease has broken me.
I've been married for 15 yrs and have dealt with this issue the entire time. His potential is what I fell in love with but this disease has consumed him, me and now trickling to my little ones. Deciding on divorce has been an agonizing decision but for my children it's a must.
I was a daughter of an alcoholic and I know how it's impacted my relationship with him. I don't want them to ever feel like they are not worthy of a healthy loving relationship and to be a priority bc this disease makes you nonexistent and codependent.
I have attempted divorce in the past and he did the same thing. He tells me he knows he has put me through hell and back and that I do not deserve this and he doesn't know how I stayed for so long so why won't he let me go.
I feel so empty right now, drained but I must be strong for my little ones and they are the reason I joined this group because I want to be the best for them and this is how I'm going to start to give my fight against alcohol and surrender and admit I am powerless and begin the healing process. I have started to attend church regularly and been praying for peace, this must be it.
Alo504lsu, I am so sorry you are dealing with this. Been down a similar road myself. I also know the damage cause by an alcoholic parent, as both of mine were. Please attend Alanon, you will find help there.
I send welcomes to you again - so glad you found us and glad that you shared. I too encourage you to attend local F2F (face to face) meetings. That's where I found local support and fellowship which so helped me when I arrived. I felt beaten down and broken too, and I've been able to have a recovery journey that helps me heal/deal with the affects of this disease.
Please keep coming back - you are not alone!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Sending my thoughts and prayers to you and your family. I can really relate to your story as an ACOH and married to one that finally found recovery. I hope you find some peace for you and your little ones.
(((Alo504LSU))), Going to church is a good idea and combining that with Al-Anon face to face meetings even stronger. Alcoholism is a disease and not a moral issue. It is a disease of the mind both spirit and emotions that can never be cured only arrested by total abstinence. It is also a fatal disease and if he does not arrest it by total abstinence he will suffer the consequences of insanity and/or death. I am sure you recognize the insanity already as the choices fit us all. Look for the hotline number for Al-Anon in the white pages of your local telephone book and then call to see where and when we get together in your area. The program is world wide and you are not alone. Keep coming back (((((hugs)))))
