The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Not sure what I'm looking for. Help, advice, suggestions, or anything at this point. My husband has been sober now for about 6 months. He was addicted to opiates and I never had a clue! About two weeks before he finally admitted to me that he was addicted to drugs the sh*t hit the fan. No Money, pawned everything worth anything, lost our home and almost my car. Turned out his mother was giving him thousands of dollars and covering for him and lying to me for over three years. My two-year old and I moved in with my parents and the husband went to treatment. For a couple months life was better than I had ever hoped. He was positive and optimistic. He was excited about his recovery. Fast forward to now, he hasn't been to a meeting in two weeks and he doesn't want to go. He says that he doesn't get anything out of them. So I tried to be supportive and went with him to a meeting, I loved it. It was awesome! He on the other hand seemed to be annoyed that I loved it so much. I guess he wanted me to agree with him and tell him that he didn't need to go. I'm scared that he is going to fail. I'm scared because I know that if he does I won't put myself or daughter through that again and I'll be done with him; I don't want that to happen. Advice?
Baht welcome to the family and sad that your fears are real. He sounds resistant and uncommitted a long with not believing and understanding how bad it actually got for him. This is danger zone...time...attitude because the disease of addiction is a monster and there are very few who can resist for long. If and when he goes back out you have to be strong for you because the disease will be yanking on you also to take you and your child down. I watch what it did to my former alcoholic/addict wife and our marriage and family and I am still amazed at the power it displayed doing its damage. When my former spouse went into rehab she chose to wear a bag over her head for 2 weeks telling everyone who asked why that "if I do not allow my self to be blindly led by others...I will not survive". Last time I saw her she was clean and sober and a miracle. I was on my own at that time trying to figure out what the hell I had just been thru.
Keep coming back Baht and find out where the Al-Anon Family Groups get together in your area and then run to go join them. ((((hugs))))
Welocme Baht I agree with all that JerryF shared. Alanoon face to face meetings will help you to find the support and tools you need to live life with serenity , courage and wisdom .
Keep coming back here as well There is hope.
Welcome Baht - glad you found us here and glad that you jumped in and shared. I too am suggesting Al-Anon local meetings - it is there I found support and fellowship to deal with the variety of issues caused by Alcoholism. The disease is powerful and called a family disease because most everyone is affected in one way or another.
I am sorry for the pain you are feeling and want you to know you are not alone. Keep coming back and get to the program - there is help and hope!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
