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Post Info TOPIC: Do patterns ever change


Member

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Posts: 5
Date:
Do patterns ever change


Just having a hard time trying to understand why I get upset at my Ah for going out with his Sponser every night to a meeting then going out after the meeting to get ice cream or dinner or go to see cars and not coming home until 11 at night . This all brings me back to the last time he was in recovery but the only thing he did different was talk about his meetings and bring home pamplets and his tokens and talked freely around me , this time around he does none of that he very more quite and says nothing . Granted it's his program and that's fine but I like to here how ppl are getting better and listen to story's about new ppl who enter the program it's exciting to me to see ppl are getting better, and of course the identity is not talked about. But also his trips out of the house again during the day like he took when he was actively drinking have started again with in the past 2 weeks and yes I know I should not be out looking for him because this is sick unhealthy behavior but of course I let myself go that route and of course I see what I should not of him sitting in his drinking spot behind trees , and I approached his vehicle and he got mad at me for stocking him , I guess that's what I did and now I don't go where my mind tells me to for the fact I do always see him in those old hiding spots , it's hard for me to trust his word since he lied so many times to hide everything he ever did , I ask him to please be honest with himself and to me so I can try to trust a little again. And is this normal for him to be spending so much time with his Sponser and going out 2 or 3 times a night weekly? I no I don't do that with my Sponser because they also have family at home they tend to. Any advise on any of my topic here will be grately taken . Thank you

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Rosemary Landry
wp


~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 894
Date:

Hi hopefloats, Nice to see you here. My suggestion is that you get busy with your own program. It is a huge step as you know for your ah to move forward with his, and you will need all the alanon support you can get for some time to come I believe. Pursue interests that really fascinate you ...this is one way to make a life for yourself :)
In kindness, wp

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~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 17196
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Welcome Hopefloats Alcoholism is a dreadful, chronic disease that not only affects the problem drinker but the entire family as well. Since we are powerless over this disease the best we can do is search out a recovery progam of our own. As WP has suggested alanon face to face meetings will help to develop new constructive tools to live by,

A I attended I found that it broke the isolation caused by interacting with the disease and found my self esteem restored .
It is a win- win so please do keep coming back.

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Betty

THE HIGHEST FORM OF WISDOM IS KINDNESS

Talmud


Senior Member

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Posts: 138
Date:

Hi and welcome!

I do agree with wp- working your own program will get the focus off of him and onto you. It will give you sanity and serenity, which we need in order to deal with this disease. It will also help you to connect with people going through this as well. The online forum and chat rooms are great and the meetings are good as well. Do you go to a face to face al-anon meeting? It will do you a world of good. My A has been sober for 72 days, but I have noticed more and more that my recovery is so important right now. Please keep coming back and do something for you!

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Butterflies can't see their wings.  They can't see how truly beautiful they are, but everyone else can. People are like that as well.  Anonymous



Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 5
Date:

Thank you I do know this I been in the program for sometime but looks like I feel off the wagon so to say . Recent move lack of friends and resources I will have to detach again to get myself on the right side of recovery thank you all for the reminders to work on me

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Rosemary Landry


~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 13696
Date:

 

 

Now that sound like Hope is floating...Yay   ((((hugs)))) smile



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