The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Today's reading in the Courage to Change focuses on learning through our experiences. I am going to start with today's reminder -
"Anything and everything about me can be used for my good. If I feel insecure or frightened today, I will remember that my fear is a signal that there is something for me to learn."
The text discusses how our greatest perceived weaknesses often prove to be our greatest strengths. Often what we perceive as weakness or character defect is what it is supposed to be, and gives us opportunities for growth that we would not have had without them. The writer recalls praying for courage always and often, only to find in this program that it was already present and available to draw upon.
Like many of us, the writer was hesitant to share in meetings. Fear of ridicule kept the writer in the back and quiet. The writer, over time, heard similar/same stories over and over again, the fear began to subside. "Calling upon a reserve of courage I didn't know existed, I managed to approach some members who seemed to have similar experiences." The writer goes on to share that over time, sharing with the group became possible, even comfortable.
The writer suggests that if the fear had simply been removed, they might never have know their capacity for acting on my own behalf. I writer determines that baby steps is what was required vs. enough strength to share with a roomful of strangers. The writer concludes they had exactly enough strength and courage to reach their goal.
Today's Quote -- "It may not be the answer I want, but I have to remember that it may be what I need." -- From As We Understood
I started with the reminder for today as it's a keeper for me. When I am uncertain and fear creeps in, I need to draw upon a power great than me to realize it's as it should be, and this is a learning time. Pleasant or not, it doesn't matter - there is a greater plan that I don't know and I am a small part of a larger picture! I am grateful for the many lessons I have learned and also grateful that Al-Anon has taught me that when there is not an immediate remedy to anything I am facing, I only need to do the next right things and more will be revealed.
Before this program, I was one who tried to force solutions and problem-solve at record speed. I often considered what seems to be the best in the moment, with what I know. What the program has taught me is my data gathering might need to expand beyond me, myself and I. Without intending or knowing, I often forced solutions that turned out to work for a moment or two, but were just not the best for all or longer than immediate. I've now learned the lovely word PAUSE and can take time before deciding, acting or even discussing solutions. There is no problem too great to be solved when we rely on our HP for support, leadership and answers.
Happy Thursday to one and all - may you make it a great day!!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Excellent reading, thanks for sharing your thoughts on it
This is perfect for me today as I had an off experience this morning and spent the first half of the day feeling dissapointed with myself for not doing better. i wont bore anyone with the details, just, a traffic situation I hadn't encountered before, which I think I navigated incorrectly and the not knowing threw me into a bit of a spiral.
This reading helps. I did learn from it; I went home, and found out exactly what to do in future should the situation arise again. So that's a win, and really that's all there is to it!!
Wish I'd read the reading at the start of the day, it would have helped, lol. Another lesson there too I guess
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If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense. Nothing would be what it is, because everything would be what it isn't. And contrary wise, what is, it wouldn't be. And what it wouldn't be, it would. You see? (Lewis Caroll)
(((Hugs))) MissMel - I hear you......thank goodness I am open today to continual learning!! So glad you got home safe and learned something new!!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Hello IAH Thanks for sharing your thoughts on this important topic. Before program, I never thought to attempt "learn from my painful experiences or to face my fears. Instead, I would simply blame others for the incident, absolve myself from any responsibility and deny my fear.
Alanon gave me tools to process events, own my part, learn the lessons and move on. I also learned to accept that some of my fears were human and necessary others were simply (False evidence appearing real).
Love how the reading points out that painful situations provide us with opportunity for growth that we would never have otherwise. (I sometimes say I wish HP had not given he so many opportunities for growth -- I would have been just as happy not being so informed) Program people remind me that acceptance of life on life's terms is important and that courage, serenity and wisdom are the greatest gifts
I have found that prayers for courage never go unanswered.
Betty - back @ ya - thanks for your ESH and my hope is your day is great too!!!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Program people remind me that acceptance of life on life's terms is important and that courage, serenity and wisdom are the greatest gifts