The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I was thinking this morning how resistant I can be to try trying new things. I tend to champion myself as a risk taker but I'm not. I'm very selective in what I explore. It's a form of laziness, closed mindedness and judgementalism.
In an Alanon meeting that I attend, we pass a sign up calendar. Members to sign up to share their experience, stength and hope. Each week there is an Alanon topic or step that's listed on our meeting dates. Some topics seem to be more popular and people readily sign up for them. Other topics seem more challenging and are less focused upon in our program and meeting rooms. It's unusual when someone will sign up to speak on one of these topics in the meeting I attend.
During the weeks when one of these topics is listed as the focal point of the meeting, the chair will read a little about the topic and then open the meeting for shares about that topic. On rare occassions, when someone does sign up to speak on one of these less popular topics, the meeting feels fresher to me. It a chance to listen and learn something I hadn't known about the Alanon program or hear something insightful about that speaker's personal journey.
I want to challenge myself to grow in new ways, explore some new options. I know my higher power isn't through with me yet. I want to remain open and teachable by my higher power, others and life experiences. If I do what I've always done, I'll get what I've always gotten. This isn't to say that there isn't value in hearing and sharing on familiar topics because life is expansive and myself and others change with living life on life's terms. I would just like to make a conscious effort to maybe do what doesn't come so naturally and comfortably not only in the rooms of Alanon but life. I don't want a stale program or a stale life. To be happy, joyous and free, I need to work it. I want to keep learning, growing, discovering.
It works if you work it so work it you're worth it. That's where I am at this morning. Thanks for letting me share with you. TT
-- Edited by tiredtonite on Sunday 24th of May 2015 09:44:58 AM
__________________
Surround yourself with people and elements that support your destiny, not just your history.
TT - our group also passes a clipboard around with selected topics and then members sign up. I've noticed there are topics that remain open week after week and have contemplated signing up for one of 'those' - just to stretch myself....I look at it and think about it and then ... fear takes hold, and I pass the clipboard.
I am not 100% sure why I do this. I am also selective on taking risks but honestly hadn't realized it was fear that was holding me back until you posted and I read your post.
This group is a newer group to me - I recently switched from another as I'd heard really good things about it. The other one was good/fine too, but I feel more at home with this newer group. Perhaps that's what is holding me back? I don't know - other than the old tape playing ... fear of failure.
I think I will pray for courage and see what the next meeting brings. Maybe, just maybe I'll have the courage to sign up for it and go forward.
Thanks for the share!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Old timers post and a good one for me because I can second guess my motives all the time. For me its about choices and sometimes the motivations for them or not. Complacency maybe, maybe not; lack of motivation also, second guessing about should I take the lead or let someone else...yes that too. The need to listen rather than speak also is important. Resistance isn't always a detriment sometimes for me it is part of good and proper planning. We are about progress not perfection. This is a good subject to go one on one with a sponsor with. ((((hugs))))
I look at those hard topics and make a note to come home and look on the internet for the answers to those topics. There is all sorts of good stuff on the net. I noticed that no one ever wanted to talk about the traditions, so I looked up traditions as they apply to the family, and I found some fabulous stuff. There is someone in Texas who has a whole paper on the web about how each of the traditions apply to parts of the relationships in a family.
A friend and I took over a room as an AlAnon room at a weekend AA convention and we took one tradition each hour and talked about the family. People were free to come in and out and share. We had paper copies and handed them out so people could take them back to their groups.
If you are ever afraid of a topic just google it. You will get lots of good ideas.
-- Edited by maryjane on Sunday 24th of May 2015 04:17:25 PM
