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Post Info TOPIC: slogan me up peeps


~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 1887
Date:
slogan me up peeps


Well I'm at the train station and it's early so I managed to get a park so good even I am struggling to find reasons to worry about it. But that's ok because before I left, after running around checking power points and checking windows (I thought I'd done away with the obsessive checking a long time ago, it's driving me mad) I discovered that the plug that connects the fridge and washing machine to the extension cord that connects them to the outlet sits on the floor between the fridge and the hot waterheater. So if the water heater leaks, it will short our the fridge and with cat and dog locked inside all day that's a reason to worry right??? So I messed with it and now it's dangling with the connection hanging down the side of the washer and the cat might pull it down and and and and.... Sigh. I have a meeting this morning with a lady I do some work for and then a class, I don't want to freak out and leave early this time!, I want to have a productive day and then waste half an hour looking at shops after class and arrive home fashionably late like I plan to do every day before I panic and rush home instead.. slogans anyone? I believe this  worry becomes habitual, I want to stop it before it becomes just a way of life again.



-- Edited by missmeliss on Monday 23rd of March 2015 05:59:31 AM

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If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense. Nothing would be what it is, because everything would be what it isn't. And contrary wise, what is, it wouldn't be. And what it wouldn't be, it would. You see? (Lewis Caroll)



~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 17196
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Dear Ms. M. I do understand your process and you're thinking, as I've been there and done that. I think HP may have pointed out the dangers of that electric cord and you took appropriate actions to correct it. Congratulations. You have taken a constructive positive action to solve the problem. Good work.

The slogan I would recommend is; let go of projecting and fear and let God bring you peace and serenity". Projecting disasters is a negative tool that we used while living in the madness of alcoholism, we probably thought it worked then because of the insanity all about. But today, living under the principles of the program, trusting HP, projecting into the future and worrying is just destructive to your mental health and does not solve a problem.
I love the reading in the Courage to Change that says what I need to know I will know and that listening to the still small voice within, instead of the loud negative voice is very important.

Stick to your plan, trust HP and believe that no matter what you can handle it. Just look back on your life over the past two years and see how far you've come. HP has not brought you this far to drop you.

Please keep connecting and let us know how it works out

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Betty

THE HIGHEST FORM OF WISDOM IS KINDNESS

Talmud


~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 1887
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Thanks Betty, that final thought especially that hp didn't bring me this far to drop me helped enormously I'm going to keep that with me today. I used to make excuses to never leave the house because I was worried what A would do if I wasn't there to manage everything. Now with no A at home it's amazing how much stuff I can worry about to avoid leaving my 4 walls!!

__________________

If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense. Nothing would be what it is, because everything would be what it isn't. And contrary wise, what is, it wouldn't be. And what it wouldn't be, it would. You see? (Lewis Caroll)



~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 17196
Date:

I do understand and it does get better Just keep showing up and using your tools.  I was even afraid to open the mail box at one time so I assure you it does get better,



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Betty

THE HIGHEST FORM OF WISDOM IS KINDNESS

Talmud


~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 1896
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FEAR - Future Events Aren't Real. Its good to take action for the things we know we need to take action for, but we can only do so much at once.

Have you thought of unplugging the dryer and washer when you don't use them? They are appliances used on demand, rather than a fridge that needs to be on all the time.

A other thing to know is that those circuits are protected by fuse and/or circuit breakers, so danger from shorts to ground caused by open water is minimized.

It is good that you are cautious, I believe that many people that have the somewhat dangerous situation you describe would never find it because they simply don't check. But you don't want to always imagine the worst case and paralyze yourself with fear.

Kenny (electrical engineer and former Boy Scout with Emergency Preparedness merit badge)



-- Edited by KennyFenderjazz on Sunday 22nd of March 2015 08:05:03 PM

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~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 1887
Date:

That's hard to imagine Betty, and really encouraging in a way considering how vibrant and awesome you are now.
Kenny its the fridge and washer on the same extension lead so its got to stay on. Unfortunately the house I currently rent appears to have been split into 2 homes and renovated by a team of circus monkeys on their day off, so the fridge cannot be close to a power outlet nor would I expect the wiring to be reliable or safe. But having said that, the laundry where the fridge washer and water heater all hang out is lined with asbestos sheeting so, you know, its fireproof...lol
Well my meeting went well and I think I just might manage to hang around till the end of my class and squeeze in some shopping :)
Feeling better.

__________________

If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense. Nothing would be what it is, because everything would be what it isn't. And contrary wise, what is, it wouldn't be. And what it wouldn't be, it would. You see? (Lewis Caroll)



~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 5075
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Those bloody circus monkeys, their everywhere. What ifs, could ruin many a day. What about what if not.... say a wee prayer and let it go. Might help. Also, think of the worse case scenario, you will cope and good will come out of it as always. That helps me.x

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Senior Member

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Circus monkeys! They must be moonlighting as plumbers as well (which would explain a lot about my house).

Another one for FEAR: False Evidence Appearing Real.

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~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 3613
Date:

Your place has managed to stay standing until this long, so the chances it will go wrong on your watch are not high.

I do believe that many of us Al-Anoners have free-floating anxiety which tries to attach itself to things.  There are lots of things in the world that potentially could go wrong, even though the chances are minimal.  So we feel justified attaching our anxiety to them.  And being with an A is a big barrel of going wrong.  So it can be "satisfying" for a worrier, because A's absorb worry like black holes absorb light.  We can direct our worry at the A and never use it up; they always generate more and more worry.  And their lives go so badly that we are justified in worrying: "This is all wrong, this is going to go wrong, this is going to be a train wreck."  Sure enough.

Then when we get the A's out of our life, we have all that worry left over.  My therapist calls it the Fox News.  In the U.S. the Fox News is the TV channel that is the most sensationalist about things going wrong in the country and about how we're on the verge of disaster.  It's like we all have a Fox News in our brains, warning us that we're on the brink.  Sometimes it's possible to say "Oh, that's just the Fox News" and turn the volume down and let it chatter on in the background without taking it seriously.

I hope you got your Fox News onto mute and are relaxing in your self-created peace that you so richly deserve.



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~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 1896
Date:

Interesting, I just read the part of Betty's post where she was afraid to open the mailbox. I realize that i was too at one time, there were so many bills from the wife's alcoholism and concomitant medical problems, and so much fear running through me that I didn't want that next piece of bad news from the mailbox that day.

I now bravely open the mailbox and take out bills. They are much lower now that wife is in recovery, they are now reasonable IMO. And when she gets them first, I'm not scared about whatever her reaction will be to them, that was the other thing I was scared of. Jerry F has helped me realize that much of my life has been fear driven, and I am now trying, sometimes successfully, sometimes not, to drive it out.

Kenny

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~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 1887
Date:

The mailbox, the phone ringing or receiving texts messages, people driving past the house, people driving past me in the street, the neighbours looking over at our house..yeah, I remember.
Especially when we lived in a flat and the neighbours could hear the dreadful embarrasing rambling, ranting and arguments and I couldn't stand for them to look at me, every time I opened the front door I expected to find one of those notes...."dear neighbour. If you do not return the troupe of performing monkeys to the circus we will be forced to call the authorities" lol. The fear was terrible and as Mattie notes, it was always there and now without A, it is trying to find other things to attach to. As always what a fascinating perspective Mattie!!
And yes I know what fox news is, some of their characters say some pretty bizarre stuff and it finds its way onto youtube and into discussions. But all of our news stations are fear mongers too, I don't watch any of them. I think that's actually a really good way to look at that fear mongering voice in my head, I'll just call it "network news" and ignore it, thanks!!

Well I came here asking for tools and you guys have armed me well.
Thank you

The day turned out well, I did everything I needed to, took my time looking at clothes I wont buy after class, managed to relax and enjoy reading on the train back. Arrived home at peak hour and needed to go somewhere and drove there is the busy traffic (I never do that) without fear, daughter ignored me and spent all night talking to a friend on skype and I didn't imagine there was something terribly wrong and just left her to have a night doing her own thing. Had a bath and then watched a silly vaguely scary show and kept hearing "noises" outside and.......ended up sleeping on the couch with the light on. The fear found me in the end, when I was tired and my defenses were down, lol!! A good reminder not to JADE if I want to get in the habit of not listening to the doomsayer voices.
Now I've had a wonderful sleep, I'm going to eat something healthy and get to it without fear!!



__________________

If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense. Nothing would be what it is, because everything would be what it isn't. And contrary wise, what is, it wouldn't be. And what it wouldn't be, it would. You see? (Lewis Caroll)



~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 720
Date:

You are doing amazing Mellie. So proud of you working the program and taking care of you and your daughter!


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Senior Member

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Posts: 125
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I love this one: there is NO OTHER SHOE. This one is common up in boston; I think us new englanders are always waiting for the other shoe to drop

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