The material presented
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to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I'm struggling with whether to commit my brother. He is 51 and has been in residential treatment twice over the past 5 years. He lives alone, is unemployed, his house is out of control and is declining steadily. He falls a a lot and is bruised all over his body. He also has a history of seizures related to the alcoholism. Last week he had a bike accident (I do not know yet whose fault it was) but it landed him in the emergency room with bruises and cuts requiring stitches.
On one level he knows he has a problem but what I hear louder is that his former employers, his medication, a bike accident 3 years ago are the blame for his problems.
My dilemma is whether now is the time and do I have the courage?
I would appreciate hearing from others and if you've gone through this process in Iowa, I'd be interested in learning how this plays out here. Thanks!
It is challenging to get someone committed for longer than a few days. I second seeking counsel from the states social service department, but I do know that in most cases, they do not involuntarily commit unless a person is imminently going to die if they use/drink again. And even then, once the person is able to say "I'm fine. Not gonna drink/use" they release them, as they are adults. The laws we have throughout the country to protect people's freedoms and liberties as individuals trump laws that place people in institutions even when they need it. It makes sense in the big scheme, but works against folks who really need help but are not willing as in this instance. This is why we have a number of posters here on MIP who have had to endure so much heartache and drama as their loved ones went into hospitals and jails....
I don't live in Iowa. I can say there was a time when I sought help for my adult son who I could see was a danger to himself and to others. I was hoping to have him committed to a hospital for treatment. What I learned was that I could try to do that and if my son appeared lucid and together in front of the judge (which he could do depending on too many factors to count here), I could wind up in legal trouble for attempting to get him help that the judge didn't think he needed based on a few minutes in his chambers or wherever else this might have occurred. Had I known that my son would have presented before the judge out of his right mind as I had witnessed many, many times, I would have gone ahead and done it, but I knew based on my experience with him that that might not be the case. There were multiple people experiencing what I experienced with him at that time but only I would have been there to say what I had seen. I decided that forcing solutions was not the way to go. I had to let go and let God, hard as that was for me.
-- Edited by grateful2be on Sunday 25th of January 2015 01:00:25 PM
-- Edited by grateful2be on Sunday 25th of January 2015 01:03:56 PM
