The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
orare hard headed. Over the generations, much has changed, humility has given way to ego. The island is alcoholic. Every single person living on it qualifies for alanon. I think its long been this way. Only I recall a fiesty lineage that was strong yet soft. Today I bumped into a fellow islander accidentally...to be honest, I aboid us as much as possible because I'm not into bs conversation or pretending I'm successful or getting plastered.anyway we got talking,she dropped the comment "oh no,I control my husbands drinking". And she believes that. I don't know,maybe I'm bitter,but I couldn't feel compassion. I thought how can you blatantly beleive that? This is Sydney whatever you dont give,he can go buy. And at home its year round tourism so they hunt in packs preying on drunk girls who aren't used to the sun. Or hang out with each other and drink away the nagging,followed by planting fishing and more commonly now underpaidemployment. I guess denial runs both sides. In truth I bit off my ah cos he was one of the worst. If I could help him,we could help us all. I knew everything but I forgot how it felt to live it,now I'm reminded. I don't like this role in in or the toll it takes. We must each walk our own paths. I must remember who I am. Love to all.
Dear Aquamom My family is filled with alcoholics of all sizes and shapes who utter such ridiculous statements ALL the time. Years ago I would attempt to explain the disease but it fell on deaf ears Today I let go allow them to have their opinions , validate my own experience and then change the subject.
I do agree that so many people could use the program and I am just grateful that I have al anon tools today.
Several years ago my brother told my daughter that I thought everyone was an addict. Really, this was sort of truthful I can't remember the movie or the tv show, but there is a line in one that became popular "they're everywhere, they're everywhere". I agree with Betty, I am over the moon that I found al anon....I wish it for everyone.
I see 3 of my 5 cousins regularly posting on facebook about alcohol and drunken episodes and they are in their 30s and 40s now. It wasn't so funny when their dad (my deceased uncle) was drunk and raging at them. I would have sworn they would all be teetotalers or, if they had a drinking problem, they'd be in AA by now like my uncle wound up in too before he died. I figure it snuck up on me because neither of my parents are alcoholics. But my cousins? We all grew up together and it was not pretty with my uncle all the way up until he got into recovery. He was sober about 15 years when he died. He would be sad to see his kids drinking the way they do after what it did to him. So yeah - if not denial on the side of alanon (and these kids all went to alateen also), it's actual drinking....
If the truth was told about alcoholism and its effects, I bet there is not a single soul on this Earth who has not in some way been affected by alcoholism. So sad.
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Look for the rainbow after the storm, and I'm sending you a double dose of HOPE. H-hold O-on P-pain E-ends
Lol Betty. I love the way you put that. They are ridiculous statements. I admit to having thought similar ridiculous things in the past, but never said them out loud. I simply said and what kind of life is that to always be worrying about him? In my gentle,musical,nana voice. Then changed the subject, then moved on. Funnily I felt good after that. I think now I know why. It was self validating. Catty island it is in modern times too. Which is ridiculous also,because we are all in the same situation.
Which is either practicing drunk,married to a drunk, or success being abandoning everything cultural and trying to raise little colonised children who think achievement is an iPad. Yuck. Yes they're everywhere! My first taste of recovery years ago, I saw every one as an addict or a co-dependent too. Now its like poltergeist, we're baaaack. Best example has to be a life well lived, since alanon in a spray can isn't viable. But maybe that can be my new visualisation. The a has on off button on his forehead and every islander female I meet,I will douse with my alanon super spray!
Dear Aquamom My family is filled with alcoholics of all sizes and shapes who utter such ridiculous statements ALL the time. Years ago I would attempt to explain the disease but it fell on deaf ears Today I let go allow them to have their opinions , validate my own experience and then change the subject.
I do agree that so many people could use the program and I am just grateful that I have al anon tools today.
OMG, this says it all re: my family.....and denial aint a river in egypt......oh yea, they can control their drugging/ drinking as they become unable to even speak, and ya know?? i don't do anything but , yea, listen and give esh to the sweet ones, then I LET GO.....my family is loaded w/ substance abusers or codas or aca's desperately needing recovery, but i am the lone ranger here...i am the only one in recovery and as i grow, i distance myself more and more from them b/c we have less and less in common........
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Live and let live and do it with peace and goodwill to all!!!!
Oh yeah! Of 13 grandkids of my dad's only 2 aren't alcoholics and or addicts. One of those grandkids died of alcoholism. Two are very close to death. The rest are in denial. There are miracles happening though. One is in a 2 year treatment program & has passed his first year of clean and sober living!!! The odds aren't very good but when even 1 makes it, there is hope.
Forgot to add that hopefully my son will get to his first Alanon meeting and I am the only other family member in Alanon. I just don't go there with the enablers.
katiemac wrote: I just don't go there with the enablers.
Yep...Me too....I will do what I can to help one who wants to help themselves...but if they don't want to make the effort or are not ready yet??? Nothing I can do but give them over to their HP and detach with peace and goodwill......
__________________
Live and let live and do it with peace and goodwill to all!!!!
I like the ginormous prayer list! Do you know some a's even try to steal g-d??! I've an aunt whose come to recent attention and she now uses religion the way she (ab)uses alcohol. My poor dear cousins must even overcome that hurdle just to feel close to hp. We are so lucky to have our recoveries.
I can't remember the movie or the tv show, but there is a line in one that became popular "they're everywhere, they're everywhere". I agree with Betty, I am over the moon that I found al anon....I wish it for everyone.