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Post Info TOPIC: sad face.


~*Service Worker*~

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sad face.


I have a friend living near my mum, we were best friends in high school and have stayed in touch on facebook, always making plans to see each other, but it's so far so it never happens. So I was thinking to myself today, you know what, that is a big silver lining. When I am there, I can go see my friend, that will be nice, she makes crafts and sells them, we have talked about making stuff together, maybe we can actually do it. Or just hang out, whatever, it'll be nice. Something to look forward to. So I message her today and she tells me, she broke up with her boyfriend and she is moving interstate on Friday to go stay with her mum...the day before I move there. She's been there for 5 freaking years, in the same place, asking me to come and see her, and now she's moving the day before I move there. She was in tears, devastated that everything has gone so wrong for her, too and so upset that I am moving there and she's going to be gone the day before I get there. We couldn't even have a day to catch up, give each other a hug.

I feel like, HP, what are you doing? I feel like you are just laughing at me and pulling the rug out from under me every time I try to get my footing!

I feel so sad that she won't be there, so sad that her life has turned to poo too and she was crying when I spoke to her, I can't make sense of this. 

I am giving this everything I have and getting up over and over again and finding my feet. 

But this is getting ridiculous. Honestly I feel like HP is just being a jerk. 

I know i am not meant to say that, but that's how I feel. 

 



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If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense. Nothing would be what it is, because everything would be what it isn't. And contrary wise, what is, it wouldn't be. And what it wouldn't be, it would. You see? (Lewis Caroll)



~*Service Worker*~

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missmeliss wrote:

 

I am giving this everything I have and getting up over and over again and finding my feet. 

But this is getting ridiculous. Honestly I feel like HP is just being a jerk. 

I know i am not meant to say that, but that's how I feel. 

 


 (((((((((((((melly))))))))))))   Golly I am so so sorry, talk about bad timing....and its OK to feel bad or mad about HP........I do it.....Mother Teresa even doubted and questioned her HP......so its OK.....I just WISH i could wave a magic wand and MAKE something real nice happen for you REAL soon.......Sounds like girlfriend has to go home and try and find her feet....so sad!!!! I wish i could do something but all i can do is send you a SUPPORT....BIG support HUG and say that this HAS to break for you soon....it just HAS to.....



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Live and let live and do it with peace and goodwill to all!!!! 



~*Service Worker*~

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Ms M I am so sorry that you have been disappointed and that your good friend will be moving before you are able to visit with her.

The hardest lesson I needed to learn was that HP is not willing to do my will no matter how hard I try to force it or plead or cry.

The 11th step reminds me to pray only for the knowledge of HP's will and the power to carry that out. When I have done that, I have never been forsaken. I have not always liked HP's will but I have been able to show up with courage, serenity and wisdom to carry it out

Prayers

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Betty

THE HIGHEST FORM OF WISDOM IS KINDNESS

Talmud


~*Service Worker*~

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I think it's positive for her that she is going home to her mum, she seems to be OK with it. Her guy was also abusive and she hung in there for 11 years, I am happy for her, and she has a mum who loves her, she talked about how she is finally giving up and going home to her "mamma's loving arms", I know she and her mum are close, it's a good thing for her. She seemed like she was finally feeling released. But just even a day would have been nice, to see a friend, I've missed her, I was feeling happy to think of seeing her in the flesh after so long. It was just a little comfort I was taking solace in, but it isn't going to be.
I remember when I posted here, ages ago, that the way I felt was like drowning in the ocean and punching the water and screaming at it for being an A-hole for drowning me. It won't do me any good.
I'm just trying so damn hard, I felt happy when I realised i could go see my friend when I move to my mums. It was a little happy cloud for me, it pales in comparison to her getting out of her sad situation and going on to a safe and happy place.
But I can't help feeling like, you know that silly old 80's song...

www.youtube.com/watch

Just so you know, I was laughing by the time I got half way through that song. Not just because of the awful 80's video.
At least I can laugh at myself when i get stuck in self-pity, lol.

I really wish I could have seen my friend just once before she left tho. It's crazy that she is leaving the day before I get there, she just kept saying, I wish you had told me, we could have gotten a place, we could have looked after each other. It wouldn't have been right tho, she has been through hell, she is happy to be going home to her mum. Something is coming for me too, HP must have a plan. And if my HP doesn't have a plan, I'm just going to have to get physical with her.




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If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense. Nothing would be what it is, because everything would be what it isn't. And contrary wise, what is, it wouldn't be. And what it wouldn't be, it would. You see? (Lewis Caroll)



~*Service Worker*~

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(((MS.M)) I do so understand and believe I have sung that 80s song often . Maybe you can plan a visit to your friend's mom home when you get settled.
Prayers my dear friend

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Betty

THE HIGHEST FORM OF WISDOM IS KINDNESS

Talmud


~*Service Worker*~

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That's a euphamism by the way, like "and if THAT doesn't work, I'm just going to have to get physical with it"". Sometimes cultural stuff gets lost in translation, so i thought I should clarify. That's an Aussie way of saying, "I am just at a loss, I can't do anything". I wondered if it sounded a bit weird or aggressive. It's just a turn of speech.


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If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense. Nothing would be what it is, because everything would be what it isn't. And contrary wise, what is, it wouldn't be. And what it wouldn't be, it would. You see? (Lewis Caroll)



~*Service Worker*~

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Ms M I did not listen to the video. Just read the title and identified with the sentiment.

I often thought" What about Me", as my life and dreams were turned up side down. I did not feel your post was aggressive or weird in any way.

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Betty

THE HIGHEST FORM OF WISDOM IS KINDNESS

Talmud


~*Service Worker*~

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Thanks Betty, I can visit her, but now it would mean driving for a day, we never got together when we were only a few hours apart, I wonder if we will now that we are both single and a bit sad and hurt? It would be a whole day's drive for me to get to Sydney. I might though, I have other friends there I have been promising to visit. Lol, I am not even brave enough to drive into the city in my big old tank, imagine me driving all the way to Sydney? I'd be so scared. Maybe I just will. Summer holidays are coming.
I really heard you re the 11th step, I know I don't have control, I get confused though because so much of my experience has been taking abuse and never speaking out for myself, I know it's stupid to say but i feel like HP is just kicking me around and never giving me anything to anchor myself with, the two concepts are hard to marry together. Like, I guess that goes right back to the beginning, trusting my HP, I get so confused. Like, i feel honestly as if HP is being such a dick to me, if i just keep smiling and trying and trusting, aren't i just continuing the same behaviour? I don't know how that can possibly reconcile, if someone hurts you and lets you down over and over, how is it healthy to just keep saying thank-you and smiling?
Sorry, I'm a bit all over the place, can't believe how sad i feel that my friend is moving, it's stupid.


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If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense. Nothing would be what it is, because everything would be what it isn't. And contrary wise, what is, it wouldn't be. And what it wouldn't be, it would. You see? (Lewis Caroll)



~*Service Worker*~

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It is not stupid Ms M It is just another item you held on to that might make this change a little better. It is important to feel your feelings, own them completely because they will then slowly lift.

When i first arrived at alanon I was not taking to my God or HP . I denied they existed and used alanon program as my HP for many years. Trust the process and truly know you are loved and cherished by HP and that all the pain is worth it.

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Betty

THE HIGHEST FORM OF WISDOM IS KINDNESS

Talmud


~*Service Worker*~

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hotrod wrote:

Ms M I did not listen to the video. Just read the title and identified with the sentiment.

I often thought" What about Me", as my life and dreams were turned up side down. I did not feel your post was aggressive or weird in any way.


 I agree with Betty, M. you were not aggressive at all and I thought it was lovely, your feelng happy for your friend who had to go home, too, b/c of a bad relationship......That shows real heart on your part....you keep putting out good energy and i know it sounds like am full of BS, but i know...i know...that putting out good energy always brings back good energy and i watch for signs...little hints...little arrows pointing me here and there, my higher self within or HP can be real subtle, so it behooves me to slow down....listen....watch..... I thought your post was honest and sincere and the happiness you felt for your friend was really sweet....like Betty says, maybe you can manage a visit w/her when both of you get yourselves settled......Hugs of support



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Live and let live and do it with peace and goodwill to all!!!! 



~*Service Worker*~

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Any chance that after a visit to her mum she'd want to move back to the area you'll now be in, and you could share a place?



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~*Service Worker*~

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I could see this as being a good thing for you. If she had stayed and you guys saw each other regularly it may have been difficult for you to cope with your friend being hurt by her man. It may be the last thing you need right now. Just trying to see the silver lining, im sorry shes moving, isnt it funny how we take until were almost 40 to leave? At least we get there in the end.x

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~*Service Worker*~

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Oh timing is a bitch sometimes! (((((Hugs)))))) Melly.

I know that my little old country is not quite on the same scale as yours but when I go back to the UK I drive for miles to see my friends. They are an inconvenient bunch, scattered across the country. It is an effort but I enjoy the journey as well as our time together when I go to see them. I agree with Elcee, it sounds as if you have a lot in common with your friend at the moment and maybe learning from others will help you both to support each other with laughter and new ideas when the timing is right.

Who knows what other silver linings lie in store for you both.

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~*Service Worker*~

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Ms M Do you have a Pay Pal account? I would like to send a small contrubuation to help you get moving and started in your new place?

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Betty

THE HIGHEST FORM OF WISDOM IS KINDNESS

Talmud
PP


~*Service Worker*~

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Betty, I am tearing up.  Melly, you are a divinely blessed woman and grace does show up in the most unexpected places.  Anything you need to express here is safe...consider this space your mamas loving arms.



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Paula



~*Service Worker*~

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cockfrockrock.jpgWhere are those mountains in Australia? If you pass them on the way home, can you dress up in drag and climb one for me?



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~*Service Worker*~

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biggrin PC

 

 



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Paula



~*Service Worker*~

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lol, Guy Pearce (priscilla queen of the desert) actually used to live on the same street as my friend and she used to be rude to him about his acne, i know that's horrible, I can't even believe we were that mean. I'm talking about when we were like 12-13 and boys and girls are mean to each other. Didn't he have the last laugh. I mean, seriously. Ouch.
Betty, I am speechless, and thank you so much.
But I'm going to be OK, I know this might sound a bit nutty but I asked all of the people I know that are religious or spiritual tonight to pray to bring me strength. I just felt like, thats it, I have had enough, I need some backup to do this once and for all. I need to get my heart out of this mess, I need some help and some man-power. Well my uncle and I had some misunderstandings in the past but he is so strong in his faith so I asked him, it must have been a shock to him as we haven't spoken for many years but I messaged him and asked him if he would pray for me. He said of course, we love you all so much and I'll get right to it..you wouldn't BELIEVE the peace that came over me, just this overwhelming sense that I am OK, I am loved, it's going to be alright.
It really is going to be alright.
I figured, if i am not on solid ground with my HP, maybe I'll ask the people I know that are if they can pray for me.
Outsourcing for the win!!!
Really though, we are going to be OK.

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If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense. Nothing would be what it is, because everything would be what it isn't. And contrary wise, what is, it wouldn't be. And what it wouldn't be, it would. You see? (Lewis Caroll)



Senior Member

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I truly believe everything happens for a reason. Maybe right now with all the upheaval both of you girls are going through, now was not the ideal time for you two to reconnect IRL. I'm going to suggest why not meet halfway somewhere once you both are resettled?

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~*Service Worker*~

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I am praying for you through this Melly! Always here sending you love and support on your journey!

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Sending you love and support on your journey always! BreakingFree

Al-Anon/Alateen Family Group Headquarters, Inc. 800-344-2666

" Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional."

"Serenity is when your body and mind are in the same place."



~*Service Worker*~

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When I divorced my x, everything in my life except for me being Mom to my two children changed dramatically. They needed to change because I had changed. I didn't have a falling out with multiple folks, we just went down different paths. There was a time that I was very afraid of losing relationships that had meant something to me. After awhile, I realized that for every person who left my life, I met another person who was better for me and me for them at this stage in our lives. I couldn't count on relationships never changing. I could count on change offering me a new way to grow and to deepen my relationship with my HP.

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"Darkness is full of possibility." Leunig

cmb


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Im thinking your HP is sending you a roommate!



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