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Post Info TOPIC: I am learning how to forgive myself.


~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 531
Date:
I am learning how to forgive myself.


I have been attending Al-Anon f2f meetings weekly for almost 5 months, and I come here to fill the gap between my meetings. I want to thank each of you for your ESH for without you all and my f2f meetings, I'm not sure where I would be.

I have begun working step 4 (am working from Blueprint for Progress, Al-Anon's fourth step inventory.) Wow, this is hard for me. I keep finding myself skipping questions b/c I don't want to answer them. I keep telling myself, it's ok. You're not perfect. You've made mistakes and you will make more. And then I heard my HP say, "now forgive yourself." I just sat with my book and cried. I'm now learning how to forgive myself. This has been a major hurdle for me.

It works if you work it. blankstare 



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Look for the rainbow after the storm, and I'm sending you a double dose of HOPE. H-hold  O-on  P-pain E-ends

Linda-



~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 7576
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Thank you for your candid share, CS. My first fourth step was a major step towards new life and it hurt - lots. Fortunately, there were people "in my camp" who helped me with it. I hope you have a sponsor working this step with you who can help guide and encourage you? This is not one of those do-it-yourself steps. (((CS)))

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"Darkness is full of possibility." Leunig



~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 531
Date:

I actually have two ladies who are sponsoring me. I feel very close to both of them. I can see why this is NOT a "do it yourself" step. Both of my sponsors told me to take it slow and write in pencil because chances are I'll need to add to or take away from some of the answers as I go. I keep reminding myself that God has told me to forgive myself.



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Look for the rainbow after the storm, and I'm sending you a double dose of HOPE. H-hold  O-on  P-pain E-ends

Linda-



~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 17196
Date:

Dear CS, Thank you for your hard work in program. I love the courage and wisdom that are expressed in this share.
Just a reminder, I was advised that since I would be doing many 4th Steps in my lifetime, I could simply begin what I could and know that I would uncover all I needed at each go around .

I believe that after working this Step, I finally accepted the simple fact that I was imperfect and human and that was fine. I could forgive my negative misconceptions and start to learn from my mistakes

Please remember to include an asset list as you move forward and continue to be very gentle with yourself.



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Betty

THE HIGHEST FORM OF WISDOM IS KINDNESS

Talmud


~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 531
Date:

Thank you, HR. I had forgotten about my assets list.

smile



__________________

Look for the rainbow after the storm, and I'm sending you a double dose of HOPE. H-hold  O-on  P-pain E-ends

Linda-



~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 7576
Date:

Good. I'm glad you have two gals you trust who are helping you with this step.

__________________

"Darkness is full of possibility." Leunig

PP


~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 3964
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It takes courage and vulnerability to do a 4th step and it takes courage to ask people to accompany you as you walk through it.  You are braver than most, Cloudyskies....this is no easy task.  And someone once told me when we cry we are closer to God...sounds like you were pretty close.



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Paula



Senior Member

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Posts: 125
Date:

There is a saying that goes around on Facebook:

"Sometimes memories sneak out of my eyes and roll down my cheeks"

So very true.

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~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 7576
Date:

Beautiful, Spur. Thank you for this.

__________________

"Darkness is full of possibility." Leunig



~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 3653
Date:

Good! I am so glad you are having this good revelation! Keep forgiving you and also find what you like about you.

Lotsa hugs!



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Putting HP first, always  <(*@*)>

"It's not so much being loved for ourselves, but more for being loved in spite of ourselves."

       http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/meetings/meeting.html            Or call: 1-888-4alanon

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