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Post Info TOPIC: Facebook and my possible mistake


~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 938
Date:
Facebook and my possible mistake


So I think I did something dumb. I changed my last name on FB back to my maiden name. I was pissed when I did it...I admit it. I just wanted to really detach from AH. Now I am regretting what I did. I thought people would just figure out why I did it without actually asking me about it. No such luck. Coworkers and friends are asking me about it. I am trying to be private about my life, and FB is not the thing I should be doing I guess. I am addicted to it really. I am usually just looking at friends pictures. I don't respond to posts very much. I dont post updates often either. I always second guess myself. Is it really wrong to change it even if it isn't legally official?? It's my business right? Ugh. What to do. I don't tell people my husband is an A. I only speak to close family members and a few close friends about my husband. I told a few people who asked about my name that we were separated and that's all I said. I never changed my relationship status,just left it blank. Maybe I need to start a 12 step program for FB addicts!! Lol. I guess it's really all like high school behavior. I could always suspend my account. 

Opinions wanted. thanks



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Living life one step at a time



~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 13696
Date:

 

 

Sound like a invitation to make an amends after the inventory.  This is not a perfect program and we are not perfect people so we get to work in progress only.  Finish the apologies and move on.   One of the lessons that kept me sane was "Don't take myself soooo seriously".   I learned to admit my screw-ups before anyone made issue of them and we all moved on.   Lots of people won't even care.   ((((hugs)))) smile



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PP


~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 3964
Date:

Not a biggie!  Free yourself up by doing what you know is right so you can deal with the "biggies" as they come upsmile



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Paula



Senior Member

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Posts: 233
Date:

A few yearas ago, when I was still home full time, I found myself stopping during the day and checking FB. Oh my! I quickly realized that this was out of control. So, I took it down and kept it down for over a year or so. Once I got over the inital withdrawal, it was great. I talked to my few, true, friends via email or text, or on the phone. Imagine that. Just recently at the request of a few out of state friends I reengaged. My friend / family list is less than 20 and I plan to keep it that way. It's another one of those boundaries I had to put up. My AH is blocked as in the past he got into my FB and read my private IMs. His entire family is also blocked as they are his enablers. 

What is great is that you can change anything you did, change name, status, delete posts, delete friends. Some FB people are very nosy & judgemental. Buyer beware.

 



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Do the next right thing~

I've never regretted taking the high road. ~



~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 7576
Date:

I don't use FB so I can't relate to it. I do relate to changing your last name from his to your maiden name. I did the same when my kids were in their 20s. I wasn't married to him. I obtained an annulment from my faith tradition. I did not want to carry a name that wasn't mine - it was his and his family's name. I wanted to carry my own name and my family's name into the future. I didn't apologize for it and you don't need to do that either. If folks asked me about it, I said what was true for me: That is his name. Not mine.

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"Darkness is full of possibility." Leunig



~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 1258
Date:

I just de-activated my FB account because it was becoming such a time sucker for me. I can always re-activate and what I'll probably do is pare down my friends list. I took it from 360 to 150 recently but I think I need to take off about another 75 people. You can always change it back or not respond or de-activate, whatever. It's your FB account and it's up to you. Do what you feel is right for YOU. HUGS!

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Never grow a wishbone where your backbone ought to be!


~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 938
Date:

Thanks everyone. What's funny is that FB won't let me change it again for 3 months. They have rules about it. You can only change your name every 3 months I guess. Lol. I should make my friends list smaller too. Sometimes I take people off then wish I hadn't. My mind loves to spin around about everything.

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Living life one step at a time



~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 7576
Date:

Well, then. Maybe this is practice for when you are using your maiden name?

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"Darkness is full of possibility." Leunig



~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 938
Date:

grateful2be wrote:

Well, then. Maybe this is practice for when you are using your maiden name?


 Possibly. It used to bother me a lot when I had a different last name than my older girls. Not sure what to do. 



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Living life one step at a time



~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 3653
Date:

From your shares it seems people walk on you. What makes you care what they think or believe you have to answer them? NO one ever questions me. None of their business.

You can do whatever you want on fb! I use my McPhate name as that is me. I had it changed back after AH went away. But since the dipstick people out there always mess things up I am afraid to change it on my ID and stuff.

I like fb a lot. But then I am with people with common interests. We support each other in so many ways. One gal just took in a couple who became homeless! We all do our best to help them. We help when one of our loved animal family members has an emergency vet thing if they need it.

I just lost my dearest oldest animal family member. With out all their support I would have been rudderless. Most of us are vegans, don't believe in breeding of any animal, all support sanctuaries. share yummy recipes etc.

Maybe you might like to look into something you are interested in and meet people who are too. Not just for anyone. You can block whoever you want you know.

I encourage you to love you lots. Protect that precious person you are! No one has the right to question you about personal stuff.

IF it is not someone that cares about you then, ask why do you ask, or oh just did. OH alls ok. whatever.

Sending you hugs with no questions!

 



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Putting HP first, always  <(*@*)>

"It's not so much being loved for ourselves, but more for being loved in spite of ourselves."

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