The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I celebrated fourteen years in the Alanon program tonight with my sponsor. She said, "I remembered!" She's so hard on herself lol. I think she forgot my anniversary only a few times in nine years. This time, I forgot and when she got out of her chair before the meeting began, I told her she'd dropped a little envelope. She had a big smile on her face and told me it was for me. She said wonderful things and I felt grateful. I don't feel I'm doing as well as she thinks I am. Some years feel better than others I suppose.
Some years have more challenges. This year's challenges have been too many too complicated. My bf's dad died earlier in the year and today we got word that his mom is likely dying. We'll see her tomorrow and know more. I'll need to pray for the words I'll need tomorrow when in the company of his family. I want to be supportive of him an not make an already bad situation worse. I'm going to need to do some readings about boundaries and compassion. When he gets home tonight I have to pass on the message that one of his AA group members stopped me and asked me to pass onto him. One of their group members whose wife died some months ago has now died too. I don't think this will come as a surprise because the group had heard he was not doing well and would not respond to their calls.
I'm grateful to be here with you tonight. It's the first place I found for Alanon recovery and I'm glad it's here for all of us. I love my life today. Some days are better than others. Most days are good and of course every day we get to have is a good day. It's a blessing to be healthier than I had been and able to make choices after believing I had none. It's my heartfelt wish to keep carrying this message of hope. Thanks for letting me share the road with you. ((hugs)) TT
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Surround yourself with people and elements that support your destiny, not just your history.
I thoroughly enjoyed reading: "I love my life today." That makes me happy to read and happy to know you want to pass it on, TT. Lots of prayers for all of you as you face whatever is necessary in relationship to his Mom and his fellowship member.
TT so glad that you are here and sharing the journey. Thank you for your message of hope. I agree we are not promised a rose garden but given powerful tools to face life with courage, serenity and wisdom.
Thanks ((grateful)) and ((hotrod)) His mom went peacefully this afternoon. We were all there with her and she was kept as comfortable as possible. I'm going to miss her and I pray that hp shows me how to keep lovingly being there for him through the loss now of both his parents in less than four months. It's been an exhausting day today. Thanks for the prayers. TT
-- Edited by tiredtonite on Saturday 23rd of August 2014 08:10:42 PM
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Surround yourself with people and elements that support your destiny, not just your history.
I am sorry TT. Your earlier post was hopeful you would find the right words of comfort. My thought was, "of course she will". Knowing you, your respect and honor for people would make it difficult for you not to find the right words. And, I am sure your presence provides a place of comfort without words.
(((TT and boyfriend))) I am sorry that he has to deal with the death of both parents in such a short amount of time. It doesn't matter how old we are or how old are parents are when they die, its tough.
You have strong program TT...trust it. I learned that was the best I could do with what I had under situations like this and when I did the fear didn't show up. When I attend celebrations which follow a death I look for things to be grateful that they existed in my life. Just learned it that way in program. Trust your program ((((hugs)))) prayers to follow.
Thanks ((((everyone))))) for your condolences, prayers, good thoughts, kind words and congratulations - for all of it! :) I took the day off yesterday to process all that happened this weekend and to just spend time with my bf. There's been a lot of talking and tears. He's made himself available to his kids if they need to talk and we've both been reaching out to people in the program for ourselves. Now more than ever it's so important to be anchored with a program of recovery, hp and our sponsors. Other problems and responsibilities don't take a vacation when a tragedy arrives. We need to keep functioning and do what's in front of us so we're asking each other for help and others in our programs. We're trying to be considerate of the emotions of others in the family yet keep ourselves safe during grieving and not react to the insane behaviors of others in the family who insist they are in charge at this time. Odaat TT
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Surround yourself with people and elements that support your destiny, not just your history.
I so get what you are saying here, TT. My sponsor, the program, and the fellowship was so helpful to me in dealing with some of the same things you are sharing here while my Dad was dying and afterwards. Without working the program and having the support of the fellowship, I don't think I could have made healthy choices for myself as I dealt with my father's death, my workload, my kids and grandson, and my sibs who are either untreated codependents and/or As. Your program share here sounds so healthy and strong. (((TT)))
prayers to follow.