It is up to the person going to decide if Al-Anon is right for them. I had a continuing question for years in Al-Anon - how did I end up here.  How did I end up marrying an A?  There are no As in my family. I could see it in my husband and in his family. I was blind to how it affected myga own - the disease was so hidden and secretive. It wasn't until my own son developed the disease even though I'd been in Al-Anon and drug myself to it and my kids to Al-a-Tot and Al-a-Teen and my sibs aged that I began to see just how prevalent that disease was in my family of origin although the focus tended to be only on one drinker in whom the disease had progressed severely or in uncles only by marriage. Booze commercials alone(that try to avoid litigation by encouraging consumers to be responsible with their drinking as if an A can or will do that or be that) and friends who can't seem to enjoy a meal out without "a wine or two" tells me how we are culturally affected by this disease. Be at peace. The people attending who don't say their qualifier drinks, might start with one reason and find out later they're really in the program for the purpose it was developed. On another subject, glad that you attend Al-Anon and know the reason you are there. The scales of denial have dropped from your eyes as they did from mine with the help of the program and continued attendance and working the program.