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Post Info TOPIC: Just went to my first meeting


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Just went to my first meeting


I went to my first meeting this past Monday.  I was scared and wondered if this was for me.  As soon as people started speaking about their lives and how alcoholism affected them I knew I was in the right place.  I could relate to everyone's story and I already know walking into that room was the best decision I've ever made in my life.  It's all becoming clear that my wife has a problem of substance abuse and how I've been enabling it.  How my anger and resentment allows her to focus on my reactions and not her drinking.  I've been a whirlwind of thoughts and emotions all week, hardly able to focus at work because I'm becoming aware that I'm at the most important crossroads of my life and need to make changes, hopefully in time to spare my two young children from a lot of hurt.  And I know I'm in way over my head and can't do it without help.  

I went in to that room ready to arm myself with knowledge and experience to combat my adversary of alcoholism.  Now I'm starting to see that it will be so much more than that.  I'm grateful to every person who was in that room and I look forward to many more meetings with those wonderful people who know me so well already.  Who know me better than I know myself.



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Veteran Member

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Congratulations on making that step. Great to know that you went for YOU! I am not new to Al-Anon but new to the forums here. I usually will go into the chat room and also F2F. It was the best decision I made as well. One thing I will say, sometimes you will feel like not going. When I feel that way I push my way to go and that was the meeting I find most useful for me. You ARE worth it! 



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~*Service Worker*~

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Littlelionman...(lol) love the nick and you might be much  more than that...in time.   Mahalo for your post cause it took me back to my first meeting and then my first real meeting.  I have no regrets that I didn't get it as well as you seem to have on your first meeting.   My wife was also alcoholic/addict and 9 years later I would also become a member of AA.   Yes this is a journey of self discovery where at first for me it was "she" discovery.  I'm glad you made it to the rooms of Al-Anon and hope that you have seen that the fellowship became who they are by learning to live in a 24 hours period of time.  Amazing that you absorbed all of that around you.  I was dumb as a stick Iused to say because I knew nothing at all about the disease and didn't even know that I didn't know.  There were many "suggestions" I heard and some I acted on when I first arrived...Obviously one was "Keep coming back" and another was "One Day at a Time" and this one was best for me at that time cause I knew so little, "Do 90 meetings in 90 days and after that if you find that Al-Anon is not for you, you can leave and try something else and we will gladly refund your miseries".  I was so sensitive and that one sounded dishonoring and disrespectful because I wouldn't want what I was going thru to touch my worse enemy.

Thank God for your first meeting...the God of your understanding and take this invitation to come back to MIP as often has you can during your learning period and changing period.   (((((hugs))))) to you and your wife and family.  She and you are suffering with a life threatening disease.  smile



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PP


~*Service Worker*~

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Wow, it is obvious you got the post it note on "surrender" and because you surrendered, you quickly experienced the power in al anon.  Well done.  Keep coming back here, there is much ESH (experience, strength and hope).biggrin



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Paula



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Tampa wrote:

Congratulations on making that step. Great to know that you went for YOU! I am not new to Al-Anon but new to the forums here. I usually will go into the chat room and also F2F. It was the best decision I made as well. One thing I will say, sometimes you will feel like not going. When I feel that way I push my way to go and that was the meeting I find most useful for me. You ARE worth it! 


 Thank you for the warm welcome.  That's good advice about going even if I don't want to.  I felt like turning around as I approached the door the first time and I'm glad I didn't...I'll try to remember that.



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Jerry F wrote:

 

 

 

Littlelionman...(lol) love the nick and you might be much  more than that...in time.   Mahalo for your post cause it took me back to my first meeting and then my first real meeting.  I have no regrets that I didn't get it as well as you seem to have on your first meeting.   My wife was also alcoholic/addict and 9 years later I would also become a member of AA.   Yes this is a journey of self discovery where at first for me it was "she" discovery.  I'm glad you made it to the rooms of Al-Anon and hope that you have seen that the fellowship became who they are by learning to live in a 24 hours period of time.  Amazing that you absorbed all of that around you.  I was dumb as a stick Iused to say because I knew nothing at all about the disease and didn't even know that I didn't know.  There were many "suggestions" I heard and some I acted on when I first arrived...Obviously one was "Keep coming back" and another was "One Day at a Time" and this one was best for me at that time cause I knew so little, "Do 90 meetings in 90 days and after that if you find that Al-Anon is not for you, you can leave and try something else and we will gladly refund your miseries".  I was so sensitive and that one sounded dishonoring and disrespectful because I wouldn't want what I was going thru to touch my worse enemy.

Thank God for your first meeting...the God of your understanding and take this invitation to come back to MIP as often has you can during your learning period and changing period.   (((((hugs))))) to you and your wife and family.  She and you are suffering with a life threatening disease.  smile


 Thanks Jerry.  Don't read too much into how much I "got" from my first meeting...I'm pretty dense myself!  It took me until I was 40 years old and seeing a personal therapist for 3 months before I even got to my first meeting.  I'm grateful to my therapist for helping me get to this point because a lot of what we talked about in sessions allowed me to really hear what the people at Al-Anon were saying.  I said that I went there looking to arm myself against alcoholism and that's not a true statement now that I re-read that.  I didn't know what alcoholism really was and during the meeting found myself having to unlearn everything I *thought* I knew about it.  I can relate to how you said your first "real meeting" because I think my next therapy session will be my first "real" session.  I'm looking forward to the journey.



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PP wrote:

Wow, it is obvious you got the post it note on "surrender" and because you surrendered, you quickly experienced the power in al anon.  Well done.  Keep coming back here, there is much ESH (experience, strength and hope).biggrin


 Thanks, and I will be coming back.  I have a glimmer of hope for the first time in...I don't know how long.



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~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 1558
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WELCOME TO THE FAMILY (((((littlelionman)))))

You have Def. landed in the Right Spot, You will find More Support & Love here then You could Imagine... And WOW... You already learned so Much from your First Meeting :) and that is WONDERFUL... I was a Slow Learner, but Thank Goodness I "Kept Coming back"! What a Blessing...I Started My Journey here in 2008 and Thank Goodness I'm Still Going Strong...

My Afather was my Qualifier, and thru losing him to this disease, I was able to Save Myself, and I too have been sober going on 4years ;) This Program will help you move Mountains in things you never thought was Yours, it has Opened my eyes and truly helps me Not be abused by my other Alcoholics All around my Family tree, Mentally, Physically, and Otherwise... cause we were All affected, But I'm the only one that wanted to change...But Now I Can Accept them where they are :)

Kudos to you for seeing that this effects your kids, I don't know their ages, but I Can say being a Product of Alcoholic parents & grandparents the Pain is there, but the Healing has so Begun... Thanks to Al-Anon...

So I Hope this Begins your New Wonderful Story... So Please KEEP COMING BACK...

Friends in Recovery...

Jozie

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Thee Only Journey I Control Is MY Own :)

Gratitude.... Is a God Honoring Attitude! :D



~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 3968
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So glad you found your home in al-anon, it helped change my life and it took time, but you are worth it! Keep coming back. Sending you love and support!

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Sending you love and support on your journey always! BreakingFree

Al-Anon/Alateen Family Group Headquarters, Inc. 800-344-2666

" Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional."

"Serenity is when your body and mind are in the same place."



~*Service Worker*~

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I just want to welcome you to MIP

You are never alone here so keep coming back

((( hugs )))


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 Lord, put your arm around my shoulder and your hand over my mouth

Speak only when you feel that your words are better than your silence.

 


~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 1896
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HI, welcome to MIP, and I'm wondering how you were at my first meeting? Actually, that was my 4th meeting, the first three I wasn't really ready to hear, so I didn't come back for a year or so. I'm now grateful that I finally came back, and that the people there and here have taught me more life lessons in the last year than I have gotten in the preceding 50!

Yes, anger and resentment seemed to allow my AW to have an excuse to drink. They were not only tearing us apart, they were tearing me apart. Since I have dropped (most of) my anger, I have found serenity. That started with the first stepo, when I realized that I was powerless over alcohol, including my wife's use of it and my control of her use of it. That realization there blew my mind, and opened me up for life changes I didn't think possible, even outside of alcohol-related problems!

Keep coming back!

Kenny

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Veteran Member

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Posts: 87
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Welcome! I had the same feeling at my first meeting. Despite all the big differences among those in attendance, in their life situations and in the degrees of the disease in their loved ones, everything they said sounded like something I could have said myself. The odd, sad commonalities and amazing wisdom and growth I saw in those men and women told me I was in the right place...even though I didn't want to be there. It's helping so much, so far. Good luck to you.

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