The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I know that when things are crazy I know it pretty much has to be me. The way I handle situations is up to me. I have issues w/ my mom from as far back as I can remember. The only thing is my parents were together long enough that we had a fairly good life. I do remember times when it seemed like she(my mom) was a good housewife & mother. But, my dad cheated on my mom. I don't really know all the details but I was told a lot of things that an 8 year old should not have known. I don't know why I am mentioning this stuff--it is way in the past. I guess I am just clarifying the fact that my mom didn't go crazy on her own. Back then or even now she has acted out for reasons. There are always reasons.
I don't have to buy into the craziness that is happening now. I know she is under a lot of stress. I know she has to move soon. My sisters are even coming up. I don't feel like they think I am doing enough for her. They have caused some rifts. I am not able to do anything that is out of my power. They are just going to have to accept me the way I am. So, when they come they might be in for a little surprise. Actually a BIG one.
I am nervous about what might happen. But, of course they aren't here yet. I am just going to have to be in the now & focus on what is in front of me.
In the meantime, I will be updating as the time goes by.
Sounds like you are doing a good job of accepting you, I admire that.
I had a few revelations about my family a couple of years ago and someone said to me 'that was their lives'. It has been useful to understand some things but now I can recognise that what my parents did, and how they reacted, does not mean that I will do the same. I guess it is all part of the getting to know me process!
Sending prayers and acceptance and wishing you a good day.
