Cross talk and other rules - Al-Anon Family Group

Walt · Veteran Member

RE: Cross talk and other rules

Bo · ~*Service Worker*~

cwya wrote:
I'm stumped by something that has come up in my new Al-Anon group. I have recently moved to a new city after spending many years in a place with no meetings and I had to rely only my alanon mojo and literature for survival. I tried for years to get a meeting up and running to no avail. Its one of the reasons I've moved. The only alanon meeting in town is nothing like I've seen before There seems to be a very strict format for the meeting as it centers on reading literature. I dont handle lots of rules all that well I admit but I'm stumped and want badly to make a go of this new meeting. I'm trying very hard to just listen and learn but I'm afraid I've hit a pothole I cant get out of. It was shared at the last meeting that cross talk means I cant share my own e,s & h on a topic someone else brought up in the meeting during my time to share. This was by no means about giving advice, interrupting someone or anything to do with another member, just me saying this is how I handled the situation in my own family. Has some new guideline come out I dont know about. How do I share my e,s, and h in a way helpful to others in like circumstances? When I came to alanon what helped me most was hearing how others had handled similar situations in their own lives.Also, the group has talked about how to tell the alcoholic's doctor about the drinking and it scared me to death. Someone said it doesnt violate the traditions because the alcoholic isnt in the program. Help! I feel like I'm in reverse alanon.

I never heard of this. My experience, in 23 years of going to meetings, and with some experience going to meetings around the US, is that this is exactly what is going on! This is what I hope to do, experience, hear, will be doing and so on. I want to hear everyone's personal perspective, feelings, etc. -- their experience, strength, and hope, on the respective topic.

Walt · Veteran Member

In my AFG, it is a book study Group Conscience decision. We read another's story from the book and share our ESH about how we Or better yet, I, handled that situation. To me that is NOT CROSSTALK. But each group decides for itself.

hotrod · ~*Service Worker*~

It sounds as if you use the book study instead of a Speaker. Glad that it works for you

Bo · ~*Service Worker*~

Walt wrote:
In my AFG, it is a book study Group Conscience decision. We read another's story from the book and share our ESH about how we Or better yet, I, handled that situation. To me that is NOT CROSSTALK. But each group decides for itself.

I agree. I have never heard that as being labeled as crosstalk.

Terry C · Newbie

Can someone direct me to the place in Alanon literature that deals with cross-talk? Thanks, TC

hotrod · ~*Service Worker*~

Walt has posted several links here is another :
www.al-anon.alateen.on.ca/srlit/crosstalk.html

masonjones5711 · Newbie

Navigating new rules in an Al-Anon group can be daunting, but it's great that you're eager to make it work. Regarding cross talk, it's about giving each member uninterrupted space to share. You can still share your experiences during your own time to speak. As for informing the alcoholic's doctor, it's best to consult Al-Anon literature or a trusted member for guidance.

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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.